Direction

Have the thought to reside in Holland after this Banjarmasin project instead of continuing the family contract with his company. Reason? Maybe we just need plenty of holidays?

Is that really wise to stay in Holland? Can i handle it alone there while he works abroad? There are too much of questions in my mind now. What if i couldn't get a job? What if i couldn't handle with everywhere filled with dutch? What if i couldn't take it for living by myself, alone? What if i miss home? What if... what if...

But everyone can do it, i should able to do it too right? I don't know! I have too many doubts and questions in my mind lately. My very own self, what i want, where i want, how i want. Then my relationship, what he want, when he want, and how he want.

I am lost i think! I don't even know how to gather everything in my mind to express through words. But the only thing in my mind now is my travel planning.

5/7 - 7/7 @ Singapore
7/7 - 14/7 @ Kuala Lumpur
23/7 - 29/7 @ Jakarta, Bandung and mum's visit to Banjarmasin
21/8 - 3/9 @ Holland
11/9 @ Kuala Lumpur
17/9 - 10/10 -> Quinten and Anita visiting in Asia

and i need more...........

I am so sucks now.. I am just having too much of time to think of crap? Or am i just.. i don't know what